Oh good! You’ve made it! I was just wondering when you would arrive. Please – grab a cup of tea or coffee (or any other drink that strikes your fancy), pull up a seat, and stay awhile. I have many a tale to tell, starting with this one…
Once upon a time, a moment of profound clarity sparked the second most turbulent year of my life. What exactly was that moment, you may wonder? Well, I was participating in a meditation during Robert Holden‘s Coaching Happiness seminar in May 2013, when suddenly, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I MUST get off the ‘life as survival’ merry-go-round and start living from my heart. I knew that it was time. In that moment, I made myself a promise to do everything it would take to live my joy. I had absolutely NO idea what I was in for…..
As soon as I made that declaration, the Universe began conspiring to fulfill my dreams, but in ways I never could have imagined. I thought it was going to be a joy ride, full of laughter and peals of delight! Instead, it’s been a rough road, fraught with sorrow, tears and pain. I’ve had more upheaval than I thought possible. I’ve been more lost and confused, questioning my purpose and who I am, than at any other point in my life. And yet a tiny voice within me has whispered, “Don’t worry. It is all perfect. You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. Trust the process.” But I often question even that. I’m not the most trusting person in the world.
Two major insights have fueled this blog. The first is recognizing that I have been hopelessly waiting for life to happen. For. My. Entire. Life. I lived with the belief that some day, when all the stars lined up just right, it would magically unfold and I would know. Know what? I don’t know. But I would know. I counted on it. And then I realized the truth, that this is NOT how life works. In that instant, my world came crashing in around me. I felt a profound sense of loss and regret, thinking all those years were utterly and completely wasted. Talk about a jagged pill!
What followed next was the proverbial V-8 moment – the AHA! I realized that life is never going to happen to me, that I happen to life. It has been patiently waiting for me all along! The ins and outs of the daily grind are life. Today. THIS is life. It doesn’t get better than this.
This doesn’t mean the circumstances of my life won’t shift in the future, they are guaranteed to. It just means that I’m not waiting for the magic to happen any longer because it is here now. I look around and take in all the wonderful circumstances of my life today. I have a roof over my head, food in my belly, a car that gets me where I want to go, enough money to pay my bills and enjoy the small things, and most importantly, a family and friends who love me. I’m still adjusting to this paradigm shift, but each day gets a little bit easier.
Thanks to all the shitty circumstances that have directed my life for the past year, I am now in a perfect position to follow my joy, or the Big Happy, as Robert Holden calls it. And that is what I wanted all along.
What you’ll find here is my written and photographic account of all this and more. I would love to hear your own thoughts and experiences. What AHA’s have you had about your own life?
The story is just beginning…